latchkey kid

so it is wednesday morning and our first milk home delivery arrives. in addition to yummy, tasty fresh milk, Lakeview Farms also offers other grocery staples (some local, all organic). We got some nitrate free bacon, farm eggs, pancake & waffle mix and a single pot pie to try. So as i am putting away my groceries - that were delivered to my door - caleb asked to help so i gave him the pot pie to put in the freezer - which he did with resounding success.

MEANWHILE. my coffee has finished brewing so i pour a cup and as i do so, caleb asks if he can have coffee too, BUT NOT THE KIND WITH MILK THAT YOU STIR. {backstory: i used to/kind of still frequent coffee shops much more often than i care to admit - often with caleb and he would get a chocolate milk which we called his 'coffee.' coffee for him has never been anything BUT chocolate milk. at home, chocolate milk does not come in boxes, it is made with MILK THAT YOU STIR}

SO. this leads to a 3-4 alarm temper tantrum - because the only coffee i have is the KIND WITH MILK THAT YOU STIR - and now caleb does not want to go to school. it was high drama - he even tried to (and sort of succeeded in) physically preventing me from heading to the car. After about 5 minutes or so, i throw up my hands and tell him FINE. you can stay here today by yourself. there are plenty of toys and books in your room to keep you busy. if you get hungry for lunch, you can get something from the refrigerator. i suggest after you eat your lunch you lay down and have some quiet time. i will be home around 5. yes, i said all of that and started to turn around to 'walk out the door.' at this point during my tirade, caleb is quiet and sort of sheepishly taking it all in. and as i am heading to work (right) he starts to mumble something.

so, thinking he has reconsidered and maybe maybe was even mustering up an apology, i get closer to hear him and ask him to repeat it. and he says, "for lunch i am going to have the new thing that i put away before."

it did it by the self of it

this is something my family still says today - taken from my adorable age 3ish vernacular. and as cute as it is, it is really the only phrase that remains from this awesome time in language. and it is an awesome time for language as i am now discovering again with my own 3ish year old. despite the fact that caleb's questions are INCESSANT and hence a little exhausting*- they are also chock full of little nuggets that i never want to forget. but, i suspect i will as i have most of the details of my pregnancy and his first year. so, to try to immortalize just a few of my favorites - i anticipate this post to be one i will add on too because i KNOW i am not even scratching the surface here:

1. endearing pronunciations, food related: 'swammich' 'creesah'

2. endearing pronunciation, while being kind of a brat: 'weave-me-wown'

3. learning manners: 'please-may-can-i-...'

4. emoting: 'you make me upset'

*i have just about given up reading books that have pictures - we end up just talking about the pictures because i can't read 3 words without a questions about who he is, or what he is doing, or why does he have that. on a related note, caleb 'reads' most of GO DOG GO to me now - and Tony and his Friends. And the Honey Hunt. given some quiet and concentration, i am pretty sure i could recite all three of those cover to cover.

green means go

thanks in part to the book 'go dog go' as well as some out in the field training, caleb is now an authority on stop lights. he is the consummate back seat driver - letting me know while i am rummaging around in my bag looking for my phone or whatever that i need to GO! the light is green now mom, GO! i am noticing a direct correlation with a reduction in the number of honks of which i am on the receiving end.

my radius

often times i agree to things that i will later regret for one reason or the other - 9 times out of 10 the event or whatever itself isn't so bad, but i would rather be home or within a mile or two radius of my home so i can be home in 2 minutes. but certainly not driving to a portion of town that i will undoubtedly get lost in.

several (many?) years ago (i was trying to think exactly how many years ago, but truthfully, i have no idea and when i queried google it don't come up with a snappy enough answer) - how ever many years ago, they built 485 that ran between pineville and matthews - two towns i knew only because there was a target in each of them (but not one in the charlotte city limits (YET)). so one day i decided to head to one of the said target stores - in pineville - or as i referred to it in my head, 'the one at the end of south boulevard'. at the time, it took about 35-40 minutes to get to pineville, but not only was there the target but also plenty of other discount shopping destinations - so it was worth it.

after scoring what i am sure were some sweet deals, i thought i would be clever and just hop on the new expressway over to matthews ('the one at the end of independence blvd with equally good prospects for scoring a great deal') and since it was nearing rush hour, avoid driving across town/on I77, etc. there is a road (regular road) called pineville-matthews road so i guess i just assumed the two suburbs were right next to each other. and now with this super fast expressway, i could be in matthews in 5, and then a straight shot up independence against traffic for a smooth 15-20.

so i start driving. and pass an exit (not to matthews). and drive some more. no exits. then an exit. and i drive some more. and then i am like, 'did i miss the exit?' so i turn around - after driving about 10-15 minutes, maybe? and i drive. and i drive. and i get off at the exit for carolina place mall (never visited) which is in PINEVILLE. so i turn around again, convinced i must have missed the exit (TWICE now). and i drive and i drive and i drive until FINALLY i hit matthews. and it is NO WHERE NEAR pineville. i vow to never travel on 485 again in my life.

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and THIS is why i stay in my radius. I still have to think twice about which of those suburbs is at the end of south blvd and which independence. i have NO IDEA where waxhaw or weddington are but i suspect providence road eventually dumps you out into one of them. i DO know where ballantyne is because i had an event there in my past life but i have NO reason nor desire to return (by the way - i went there pretty often for about a year and a half. i always took the freeway except one time i experimented with colony road. unsuccessfully).

but tonight? i have agreed to a tasting at rivergate. i just google mapped it and it is almost to south carolina. past the dreaded 485 - like, WAY past it. the address says charlotte, but i say no. and i am thinking...why, oh WHY do i agree to do these things? south carolina, will be seeing you in just a few hours.

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Aspirations

if there is one thing i have, it is good intentions and aspirations. the execution and follow through proves to be quite a bit more challenging. here are just a few things on my wish/idea list - if only i had the motivation and dedication to see it through...baby steps may be the solution.

1. remodel the house. sure, we are fine in our 1274 square feet. there are plenty of people in the world that would consider 400+ square feet per person a luxury in fact. but i am going to step inside my selfish world momentarily and say that one bathroom has gotten crowded now that caleb is finally potty trained and we sure could use some storage space and i would just like to update and redecorate. or maybe we just need less crap. i am thinking it is surely the latter - but i would hate to admit that. so the issue becomes - am i ready to pack it up for 4-6 months and spend $100K+ that i don't really have to do this thing once and for all? no, not really. but yes, really because i take one look at those bathroom fixtures in the ikea catalog and i get all excited again!

2. eat locally. the past 3 books, maybe more, have all been food related (surprise) and of course the evils of processed foods that travel thousands of miles and the virtues of home grown produce, farmers markets, locally raised meats etc. i am a believer - seriously. but i still find myself succumbing to the temptation of large scale agriculture and unwilling to put a better effort to really commit to local sources. i failed to dig the asparagus bed earlier this year and while we have done a fair job with tomatoes and cucumbers, we are still cheaters because it is not technically our garden.

3. have a nice backyard. i love the idea of a tranquil, green, lush backyard but what i have is the disastrous aftermath of a rash decision to rip everything out. I am left with prehistoric size wisteria stumps that continue to sprout, 'grass' that is in fact 60% weeds, a rotting shed, poison ivy that prevents Erik from really digging in - a job far too big for me to even know how to tackle. what i want is: a shed like the one next door, a hedge of the tall skinny evergreens like they have in europe, a vegetable garden of our own WITH an asparagus bed, some grass to play in.

BABY STEP GOALS

1. call matt, spend the $500 for energy audit, measurements and initial plans

2. better meal planning, have erik stop on his way home from work

3. borrow the bobcat from joe and just start clearing. if this fails, hire someone to do it.

Are You There Internet? It's Me, Emily

I am a super failure at this blogging thing! I really just remembered that I never wrapped up my 'Things I Learned' that week and now too much time has passed and I have already forgotten the lessons. I may owe an apology to San Francisco for the final night when I wrapped it up and cut it up with the Spaniards - they are a rowdy bunch!

So here is the list of blog entries that I have failed to write:

1. 'Things I Leaned the week of...Part II, New York'. Highlights included my attempts to act like I was totally comfortable in that city. I did manage a crosstown errand to track down a bottle of Mas Donis Barrica in its fancy new package. Never found it and deeply disappointed a certain someone that did not deserve to be let down. But I navigated across several streets, in and out of 3 cabs, and into a couple buildings with resounding success.

2. 'Things I Learned the week of...Part III, San Francisco'. Arrival to perfect spring weather, decent tasting, lots of trips to NOPA, a late night at Absinthe, amazing dinner at Spruce. Wrapped up the final night at about 4am drinking Mas Alta (?!?) that i managed to talk the night duty folks at the Fairmont in to letting me grab out of our storage room. Apparently I can do 'sober' and 'responsible' pretty well even at 3am.

3. 'Sayulita, Mexico'. Casa Brava was pretty much one of the greatest houses i have ever stayed in. Taco Tour was pretty much the cheapest best 'meal' i have ever eaten. Non-naps were pretty much the greatest escapes my brain have had in recent memory. Week long girls trip is pretty much a great idea for a vacation. Returning from Mexico exactly 2 days before 'SNOUTBREAK 2009' was pretty much not cool at all.

4. 'Spain 2009'. My first trip since second grade and it was AWESOME. I hope to spend much more time in this amazing country! I made a very novice little multimedia piece (that impressed!) that can be viewed HERE . In addition to the wine things, i visited the Reina Sofia in Madrid and have an amazingly visceral, emotional visit thanks to one Pablo Picasso. Guernica is truly something to be experienced, not just viewed - it about brought me to tears. Also was this extremely eerie sculpture piece by Juan Munoz called 'Many Times' and then the exhibit on the New Figurative Movement made me ashamed I do not know a bit more about the world of art, because i sure do enjoy it. Had wine meal of a lifetime at Kabuki restaurant - maybe i will write this up separately sometime and include some of the pictures i took with my phone that night.

5. "My Cub Turns Three'. So this just happened but i am pretty much in shock that i have what is now a real little boy (at this point he would say, 'i am NOT a little boy - i'm a big kid!') who does boy things and knows the big 5 dinosaurs and likes to do kung fu and exasperates me to no end until he says 'mom, i am happy now and i like you' and loves dressing up as a super hero and can't play chutes & ladders or memory the correct way which drives me nuts and who laughs at all the right jokes and finds things as silly as they are and who asks to be tickled and has his own cute names for food and drink (like CreeSahs). Babies are fine - sometimes i miss the peace but i just can't imagine getting all worked up about rolling over and shit like that when now caleb can tell me that a T Rex eats meat and that means he is a carnivore. Skills!